Why Tough Love?
Hi, it's lovely to meet you...
I suppose I should introduce myself, after all it's only right. How can you decide if you continue reading if I don't?
When it comes to finding a name that sums up the essence of a person, it's much harder than you think. It reminds me of the old fashioned 'Record of Achievements' that you got from school. Can you remember those? I loved how important it felt with its red leather (was it leather?) and gold writing. Anyway, in those records we were expected to write a personal statement that told people about ourselves.
Nightmare… I think mine told you how I was always punctual and loved reading. Only one of those things were true!
You have probably already noticed that I can lose track easily... Anyway, back to choosing a name.
Working as a therapist for just under 5 years, I have worked with all kinds of people, for so many reasons. I love the variety of my work, but I noticed a couple of years ago that I was attracting clients who had things in common with each other.
- Low Self Esteem
- Lack of Confidence
- Poor Self-Image
- Weight Issues
- Anxiety
- Depression
I also found that as much as I loved working with things such as fears & phobias, insomnia, driving/exam nerves, smoking etc I had a real connection with a certain kind of client.
You don't need to be a psychologist to figure out it is because I could relate to what they were telling me. Throughout my life I had suffered with poor mental health and had weight issues. My relationship with myself, at times, was at an all-time low, if we had been two people we would have been sleeping in separate rooms. I had forgotten how it felt to like myself and be like myself.
I like to think that I was an outgoing, funny, loving person, but the reality is I was medicated, tired and in pain. Physical and emotional. Oh, and overweight, very overweight.
When you reflect over your life it is much easier to see how things could have be done differently, how different kinds of support would have been helpful and how certain choices may not have been helpful in achieving a life you are happy with.
It would have been useful to have some kind of coach, someone who had the tools and resources that could be passed on to help in a difficult time.
Can you see where we are going?
Tough Love is what can be needed. Not in a shouty, judgy kind of way, but someone who will hold the space for you as you start to pick up the shattered pieces of your sense of self. Someone who
will gently guide you as you get you back on your feet. Someone who will help you through the anxiety, depression and self-doubt. Hey why don't we call that TLC?
What happens then? Do you need help working through limiting beliefs or bad habits, do you need calling out on your bullshit excuses about why you can't get to where you want to be?
When I looked for a name for who I am and what I can offer to you, I wanted all the above, so here we are. TLC when you need me to be there while you learn to stand and Tough Love Coach when you need the push.
After all the idea is that eventually you learn to fly by yourself.
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